Kristen is the one, she’s always been the one, but even after 6 years of friendship, I was unable to tell her about my feelings. We spent a lot of time together, just the two of us playing video games, watching movies and doing anything and everything that two best friends would do together. “Friends”, that’s all and only name for the love that I have been hiding from her since we were 12. And now she was going far away from her parents, friends and me for her further studies. All I knew was I still couldn’t tell her how I felt, the fear of rejection was somehow more powerful than love. It’s not only that I want to be in a relationship with her, but even sometimes other people including our mutual friends and two of her cousins had asked if we were into something and “just friends” was the pet reply of ours.
I don’t want it to be like that, but I couldn’t help it. Anyways, she’s going that night and I just had an hour to spend with her along five of our other friends. I got to house earlier than others and she greeted me with a huge smile on her face. We had a plan to meet at her house. While waiting for the others, we sat talking about anything to everything like what we all would do when she’ll get back from New York for her holidays and we talked about the same stuff all the time, but today there was something in her eyes that failed to resist looking into them. It was like they had a story which seemed so important to be told. I thought about that a while but this thought was dismissed as soon as the rest of our group arrived. Alan had a plan to play our favorite childhood game of ‘Hide and Seek’ in the adult’s level by taking it to the graveyard. Kristen resisted to the idea, but when all of us forced her saying that it was the last time we were together, she got into it.
We reached the city’s biggest cemetery of Germany Street in Alan’s car and with a short game of Stone-Paper-Siccors, I was chosen to be the finder. I didn’t have a clue where anyone could be hiding, but I was sure Kristen was uncomfortable about the thing so she would be near the entrance. When I reached the place, I couldn’t believe my eyes, her face glowing like a diamond under the bright moonlight which made me unable to take my eyes off her. With that beautiful face, loving eyes and elegant black gown she started towards me. Meanwhile, my hands started to shake and a shiver of tremble ran through my spine. At that time I realized that I couldn’t let her go just because of that fear which seemed so small now. She was everything I could ever ask, loving, caring and fun. While I thought all this, unknowingly, my mouth uttered “I love…”. “I knew!” she said stopping me in between and we kissed.
We kissed under the moonlight and mockingly in front of an old grave. That grave had a name written on it, it said “Kristen Brown: 1994-2010”. I knew she wasn’t alive anymore, but I can’t help love.
That night, when I kept searching for her, her parents picked her up for the flight which she was going to miss if they didn’t get at the main door of the graveyard. She boarded the flight which instead of landing at Airport went straight to the Heaven with flames all around. And until today, I was searching for her with a regret in my heart of not telling her how much she meant to me and not reading that she had the same feelings for me written in her diary that she always used to forget at my home, now I know, knowingly. After these many years, I confessed her my heart, but we can’t be together now. We could have been if earlier I was brave enough to tell her that Kristen was the one.
Kristen died on 22 May 2010 and Frank is living in an asyllum getting a treatment for his mental disorder. He was lucky because he had the chance to express his feelings to his soulmate, but also unlucky because he never really expressed them. They will remain “just friends” for the rest of Frank’s life though none of them wanted this to be that way.
Are you hiding your feelings from someone? Or are you having trouble telling them the truth? Tell me in the comments and we’ll solve your problem together.
The image in the today's article was from our friend whom you could follow on Instagram for more pictures like that: Captured Nina